(Corrected) The Moment That Shattered My Reality
“Between stimulus and response there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and our freedom.” — Viktor Frankl
I spent years studying, teaching, and practicing the idea that how we experience reality is not objective—that we experience only our interpretations of the world, not the world itself. And yet, despite knowing this, I kept falling into the illusion. I reacted as if reality was happening to me. I frustrated myself. I discouraged myself. I forgot.
And then, one day, I saw something that changed everything.
I was in an old curiosity shop, the kind of place where time itself seems to fold in on itself. Among the dusty relics, I spotted a peculiar mirror—tall, slightly warped, with an antique frame. At first, it seemed normal. But when I reached for my face, something was off.
There was a delay.
My reflection moved a fraction of a second after I did. I raised an eyebrow—it followed too late. I smiled—it hesitated, then mirrored me. It was as if my reflection had fallen out of sync with reality.
For a moment, I was unnerved. Was I hallucinating? Was the mirror broken?
Then, the realization struck me.
This mirror was not malfunctioning. It was revealing something that had always been true, something I had never seen so clearly before:
I am always looking at a delayed version of myself.
Not just in the mirror—but in life.
Reality as a Lagging Reflection
Every experience we have is filtered through our interpretations. We do not react to reality itself—we react to our meaning-making, our assumptions, our projections. But because we confuse our interpretations with objective truth, we believe we are responding directly to “what happened.”
When someone insults us, we think they hurt us. But what really happened? Sound waves hit our eardrums. That’s it. The emotional pain comes a split-second later—when we interpret the words as an attack, when we assign them meaning. We feel hurt because of our interpretation, not because of the raw event itself.
The mirror showed me this directly. It showed me what is always happening but goes unnoticed: my experience is never immediate. It is always shaped by something prior—my beliefs, my expectations, my conditioning.
What if we could see this in every moment?
Why People Resist This Truth
Most people recoil at this idea. If we admit that our suffering comes from our interpretations, then we must also admit that we are the ones creating it. And that is disturbing.
We are afraid to take full responsibility for our thoughts, emotions, and actions. In the world of objectivity, we can assign blame. We can hold others accountable for how we feel. We can convince ourselves that we are at the mercy of reality.
But here’s the great paradox:
The very thing we fear—taking responsibility—is the key to our freedom.
When we stop mistaking our interpretations for objective truth, we stop being ruled by them. We stop giving power to external forces—and to other people—who were never in control to begin with. We realize we're not passive recipients of reality but active participants shaping it—moment by moment.
Breaking Free from the Lag
So, how do we escape this illusion?
Pause and Question – The next time you feel triggered, stop. Ask yourself: What am I reacting to? The event itself? Or the meaning I’m giving it?
Recognize the Delay—Like a time-locked mirror, your emotions reflect your interpretations. Can you notice the gap between the event and your reaction?
Reclaim Agency – If your interpretations create your experience, then you have the power to shape them differently. You are not stuck. You can choose a new interpretation—a constructive one leading to a new response.
The moment I left that shop, I felt different. Not because the world had changed but because I saw, with piercing clarity, that I had always been looking at a reflection—one that I could shape.
And so can you.